wAd^a^l0n3ly^w0rld*

2006-08-18T20:11:00.000+08:00

18 August 2006

If you have a chance to see this blog i updated on certain days.. (to sum1) i want to tell you, i am sorry i lied to you.. you shld noe who u are.. i don't even noe why i am lying to you all these while.. but jus to tell you that, if u really angry with me,think i am very ridiculous,please stop wasting ur time on me.. i dun wish to disappoint u at the very end. i believe you have other girls in mind right..? if u have anythin to this post i updated, jus sms me. but i wun reply.. i feel too guilty.. =(
I made too many sins... i know *Lord will forgive me, but i cannot even forgive myself.. Another one, i am habing a cold-war with my friend.. she changed a lot.. too much.. too obvious.. its no use hiding,i can tell.. not only me, everyone can tell.. its jus too FrEaKIN fake.. all the things u do shows, the way u FrEaKIN speak.. dun complain, i tell u first,dun complain abt how ppl treat u.. ThINK abt the way U treaT ppl.. or izzit.. i am the one who changed?? last but not least, a girl in my class,who appear like how she is now, is not what she is.. those who noe who, jus noe it.. i can say shes can be a great actress... ;)

I seriously need some relAXAtION...! swim is all i can think abt now.. swimming continuosly.. i really.. really missed those friends back in primary school.. i need them.. without them, everythin we went through together wouldnt make me for wad i am nOW.. They changed me, my world, my attITUdE.. i could have been a very bad girl now.. i am struggling inside my heart.. though some things, can never change.. not at aLL.. I am akways trying to control myself not to do things i'm not suppose to do, but i cannot control myself when that situation appears right before my eyes.. and whenever i tries to do something bad on purpose when sum1 does that to me, i didnt have the heart.. wHO AM I.. WhAT AM I..
Theres very fEW ppl i can go too now.. i guess, ppl jus changes within time.. that i cannot change.. l0lx.. y am i talkin abt this cRaPPY sHIT.. l0lx.. if not i got nothin else to talk abt liao... ONe thING, *I LIES tOO muCH*

Comf0rt and m0ney is n0t everything to me. FreEDOM is..
[Friday,8.30p.m.]

2006-08-12T21:40:00.000+08:00

12 August 2006

Heh... Today quite happy.. got go church with Joel Cheang and his friends. i got to noe Ting Ting too.. Wow, shes a great girl i can say.. actually, many of them dere are too.. heh.. There was many singing and jumping and some funny topics spoken by Pastor Jeff.. Too bad i dont really noe much of the ppl there well.. if not i am gonna enjoy it a lot. its my first time ya noe..hehe..

Today go Regent Grove swimmming oso... met my kor and *some1*.. my stupid kor go hit my head for nothing.. l0lx.. but he quite farni la.. sec 2.. quite handsome la.. but too bad got gf.. if not every girls ask me for his hp le..!!! HAHA.. jokin... =.=''' pain sia... he say next time pinch my face... ! ...

Nearly forgot abt my history project.. Die sia.. but lucky i got think abt how to do it le then still got 7 more days... WORSE OF ALL IS MY DNT!!! freak le..( i substitude f**k with freak) 2nd batch cause got no time must rush... sianz... teacher very wad lo.. everytime oso demerit.. freak... now still got hmk that my friend took abt 6 HRS TO FINISH!!! FREAK!!!!!!!!!!!!!! tomorrow must pass up liao.. still need to do sumthin using the wadeva plastic.. sianz...

Patience Is The Key To One's Heart.. ---> AS IF!!!
[Saturday,9.58p.m].

2006-08-08T20:08:00.000+08:00

8 August 2006

WAhhs... sry guys... sh0 long neber update.... ><><

*imagines*
today oso worth it falling down playing basketball.. i cant believe i shoo long neber play le still can win the match against the rest... i admit my skills quite good.. hahass!! j0kin la.. not as good as basketball girls .. i only good in shooting.. *i guess..* i forgot tomorrow go out go put one whole patch of purple medicine on my injury.. T.T it wun be off for days... AHHHHHH!!!! T.T aiya.. i dun care le.. can go out then good le... heh...

ND ceremony today oso quite fun... i tot it will be very boring.. hahass.. miiss sum1 s0 much.. l0lx... eh// i noe my blog very boring de lahhs... jus see updates only.. l0lx.. next time i more pro i go make nice nice de bl0g.. heh... *kiiddin*.. i really love to laugh a lot eh?

Laughter is the Best Medicine
[Tuesday,8.11p.m.]

2006-07-06T19:31:00.000+08:00

6 July 2006

Sian la... anyh0w sae i liike Jonathan.. kiiies la.. i forever dun talk or sms to him happy?!.. forget abt it.. wadeva i sae u guys wun listen.. nbms... Today table tennis lucky not scolded by coach.. haish.. felt so relaxed.. feel so stupid... get involed in such things... haish..

*if only... if only things went back to when i first came in to sec school... and i can change everything that happend... if only.. if only, i'm the ugliest girl in the world.. then no one wold ever liike me.. how i wish.. i've neber met any1 at all...
if only the ppl i want them to see my blog entries will see them now...

If only the tiime can chang3..
[Thursday,7.55p.m.]

2006-07-03T16:02:00.000+08:00

3 July 2006

Today's the day,where i'm feeling so bored... but at least i leveled up in maple to lvl 35.. ^.^ maybe a bit happy.. heh.. not much to say really... D&T hmk must be rushed by the teacher cause less than half months only... sian... so much to do... but i'm aiming for 3 A1s for my CA2.. i must do it... though its only for either english, maths, chinese, science and history. i'm aiming for english, chinese and history..

*imagines*
how happy i will be if i really achieved that.. my ex-tuition teacher tells me that.. he's really a great tuition teacher.. he helped me a lot.. he gave me goals.. which i might not have for maybe the past few years?

**imagines even more** wad if i get A1 for english in my 'O' levels.. i will jus throw away the paper and scream like mad n pick it up again.. haha.. >< english is the most important.. that is my goal, for the next 3 years.. i wanna get a degree and then migrate to austrailia... haha..

*stops imagining*..
i have to study hard to achieve wad i want... =)

Wisdom from Lord, is the only key to open my heart n soul..
[Monday,4.09pm]

2006-07-02T14:16:00.000+08:00

2 July 2006

The Days Of Hatred.. Dun tr3at me like a f00l.. u know wh0 u are.. dun treat me like i'm a puppet.. i hate it.. i wont sae out ur names.. cause i dun wanna make ya embarrassed.. jus know.. one day.. u guys will regret... regret.. REGRET! Dun treat m3 like your friend anymore.. i dont wanna have anythin to do wif u.. especially.... hyp0crYYTES!!

**** i hate you.. dun act like ur kind.. i knw ur true heart... i can tell thru ur actions.. thru everythin u does.. not only actions.. words.. i'm not like a f00l u think.. ur the f00l.. dun think i'm insane. ur the one whos insane.. i dont want anyone to pity me saeing i have no friiends... i have... and they the one and only ones... if u dont know that u are a hypocryyte after wad i wrote.. never mind.. but.. u will foreva be one..

i will never forgive u
[Sunday,2.21pm]

2006-06-30T20:31:00.000+08:00

31 July 2006

Oh man.. since a loing time i've updated my blog.. i've did badly in the past 6 months in m y exams.. my tuition teacher gave me a target.. 3 A1s... i want to prove to everyone, i can do it! but the problem ish.. seems like i always get used to being tired and sleepy after studying for a while.. i just cant help it.. i really wanna do well for my exams.. i am willing to pay the price.. hard work i noe.. i will do it.. i will.. haish.. cca oso very sianz.. coach keep scolding me.. but i wont blame him.. cause everyone need to buck up for the competition next year.. if we dont,everythin will go down the drain.. all the efforts put in in the past will be gone.. i dont wish for that to happen.. Lord,i know you will help me. I know you've always been by my side, for i can feel your presence.. and you telling me inside my heart what is right what is wrong.. u've been consoling me all the while.. i would have gone mad without u.. Thank you.. i'm gonna have swimming lessons for 10 times! wonder how tanned i will be by that time.. i've been avoiding reality.. theres too much things i am so afraid of.. hurting ppl.. hurting myself.. i jus dont face the reality.. Lord, forgive me..

U put in effort,u get your reward..
[Friday, 8.37pm]

2006-06-05T19:00:00.000+08:00

June 5

hmmm... di3... me tryin to remember wads my tuition teacher's birthday.. 13 june or july.. hmm.. m0st prob july.. sh00 b0ring.. 9 June must g0 genting lia0.. h0pe can purchase c0ntact lens before i g0 there.. cant see without my specs.. p.s.really.. l0lx.. 11 June then come back.. h0pe i will enjoy it a lot there.. haha.. and not die of freezing.. n0thin much else i can really sae.. though some things cant be revealed through my blog where every1 can see n noe exactly h0w i feel.. haiz.. till now i have found nothin or any1 i can entirely tell my feelings n thoughts too.. those i trusted once.. i has already seen through them n their true colours.. h0w they have humilated me.. betrayed me.. make empty promises.. they just dont know how much a promise means to me and h0w much God l0ves them.. misunderstandation.. hah! wh0 noes.. n0body cares.. i feel.. feel so totally like a stranger to every1.. it seems like only my sister, father n mother r the ones who really love me.. i dare not think of gaining anything else.. i must treasure wad i have now before they r gone.. giving me heartbreaks.. sadness.. hatred..nbmss..

interpretations lead to misundetrstandations.. [ Monday, 7.06p.m. ]

2006-06-02T18:41:00.000+08:00

June 2

mwahahhas... 1 day neber update bl0g.. l0lx.. br0 l0r.. dun wan let me play c0m.. s0bx.. m3 t0dae went to lot 1 n jurong library t0 l00k for that damn literature book to d0 the project.. sianz.. h0liday d0esnt seem like holiday at all.. =.= met Alvin at l0t 1.. he suxs... he himself so ugly still sae me.. hmph! idiiot.. n0 taste 0ne hiim... call me sucker u then ar.. i got de zui u meh? PIG HEAD!!!! ZHU TOU!!! msn still sae.. idididotitisitisoitoiisotiTTT.. nbms... 0w i sae everythin 0n bl0g i f33l better le.. hehx.. me so shuang.. at least every1 n0e wad he did!! mwhahahhas... anyway.. LV 17 suxs... i wonder y i so unlucky go that class.. i not critising my classmates.. jus s0me iidiiotic ppl iin the class... especially j0el chiin!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! argh... i cannot stand it lia0.. t0dae s0 frustrated n angry... h0w i wish i can g0 church.. f0r i knew everythin wil be g0ne... everythiin wiill bec0me peaceful.. s0 calm.. liike i'm iin heaven... i can feel L0rd ish wif me... me must stop usin c0m le.. lata parents ban me fr0m using c0m then i die lia0.. buai..

Lord, give m3 wisdom.. [ Friday,6.46 p.m. ]

2006-05-31T22:37:00.001+08:00

May 31

I'm so happy!! parents c0min backk t0nit3...^^ i miiss th3m s0 much.. n i 0so w0nder wad th3y wiill briing back for us! h3hx... fiinally... thiings went smoothly at everythin.. n0 m0re enemiies... (i think) n0 m0re hatred f0r s0me ppl.. i'm s0 relieved.. =) i feel so blissful.. i n0e God helped me.. thank you Lord.. i wiill neb3r f0rget ur l0ve towards me again.. everytime i went to the chrch t0 worship y0u.. which my parents are against.. i was so reluctant t0 leave there.. i feel so peaceful.. so calm.. its t0tally different wh3n i'm 0ut 0f there... i criied f0r euu.. i'm s0 happy Lord.. i l0ve y0u... Amen.. and.. i beta remember t0 g0 for table tennis training tomorrow... >< mY l0v3 f0r y0u wiill neber st0p.. as well as y0ur l0ve f0r me.. [Wedneday,10.42p.m.]

2006-05-30T00:27:00.000+08:00

May 29

haizz.... me s0 b0redd todae.. though a bit busy todae.. s0bx... miss parents s000 much.. at least they comin back on wednesday n i h0pe tuition teacher will bring me n sis go bowling n watch movie..ytd neber bring us go... s0bx... nbms.. anyway its wrong to keep spending money on us anyway.. =.= me so evil n bad.. hmmm... went to yew tee todae... neber wear specs like blind mice.. l0lx.. me sia0 le.. sia0 fr0m being b0red n from my bro... WAAAAA... me cannot stand it le.. mama .. papa... faster come back.. grgir me u all s000 much.. s0bx... dun leave me ever again.. next time u all go overseas me must go!! me regret neber follow.. sob.. i'm so tired.. sleepy... *yawns.... mama papa gir gir love you n will study harder and never disappoint u again.. i dun want u all to cry for me k? love you.. muaCks...

Alth0ugh i l0ve my parents,i will neb3r st0p loving Lord.. [Monday,12.31a.m.] aiya.. consider as monday again la..

2006-05-29T00:16:00.000+08:00

May 28

t0dae ish a sup3r b0ring dae... haiz... i really dunn0 wad i am exactly thinkin abt.. i jus miss my parents so much... =( seems like i cannot live with0ut them.. too bad tuition teacher neber bring us g0 b0wling todae.. s0bx.. nbms.. maybe t0morrow then bring us g0.. ^^ at least dun need stay at h0me s0 bored.. then we watch the movie.. - X-men,The Last Stand.. co0l.. cant wait f0r tomorrow... i dun really wanna t0k at l0ve life here.. c0s i'm so sick of it.. very sick.. that i wouldnt dare think abt it at all.. not even 0.00001%..... any reply for my stories jus write in chat box.. thxs..

My h3art has 0nlY God left.. [Sudnday,12.20a.m.] consider as may 28 la.. ><

2006-05-27T21:31:00.000+08:00

May 27

Oooh... i l0ve t0dae!! tuiti0n teacher bring m eg0 out so happy.. me at his h0use update my bl0g.. ^^ lata 11.30 liddat g0 watch movie le.. -Over The Hedge.. heh.. h3 0s0 bought the DA Vinci c0de book for me..^^ ben ben 0s0 g0t c0me.. ^^ so cuttee.... miss him so much.. he n his future wife Khema oso come.. l0lx.. we say s0 many j0kes that we keep laughin.. keep eatin so much ice-cream.. stomach pain liao... l0lx.. oso drink alchohol.. it tatse... DisgustIIng... =.= but i wanna try get drunk.. l0lx.. cann0t.. lata miss moviie die liao.. very hard t0 book... me todae do new hairstyle.. neber wear specs oso like blind mice.. =.=.. but me think very nice.. hahass... jkjk.. aiya... lata i t0k too much blog full lia0.. lol.. k la.. me go play playstation le.. hehx.. dun jealous of me wor.. ^^

My lOv3 fOr Lord wiill neb3r end.. [Saturday,9.35pm]

2006-05-26T13:50:00.000+08:00

May 26

s0bx...t0t t0dae tuiti0n teacher g0in to bring me n sis g0 out.. in the end neb3r... s0bx.. nbms.. maybe he busy.. miss benben(d0g) so much!! m3 s0 b0ring at h0me.. i rath3r parents at h0me.. s0bx.. miss mama n papaa s000 muchhh.... s0bx... s0 l0nely... me wan tuiti0n teacher to call n briing us g0 0ut!!! s0bx... =.= m3 s0 childish.. nbms.. g0t bl0g t0 write things inside i s000 happiie.. ^^ first time... s0 fun... i need to n0e more abt blogging then i will improve on it n mak3 it da besT!!

ps. dun mean to be proud.. ><

l0nely daY starTed.. [ Friday, 2.01 p.m.]

2006-05-25T19:02:00.000+08:00

May 25

A daY after my birthday, 24 May... well,wasnt a happy day though..t0day's i made my very first blog.. wasnt that nice though.mad over friiends.. l0lx_yeA,everyday.. n0b0dy n0es my f33lins. hah.. n0thin to sae f0r n0w.. parents g0 overs34s can g0 out myself.. ><>